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Milestones and the passage of time

March 13, 2011

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” – Robert Frost

The last few weeks have been really busy, through recent book donations we have increased our book donations from 10,000 to 13,500. We celebrated Courtney’s 31st birthday last week with our wonderful partner schools in Vancouver, WA and Klamath Falls, OR just as we did last year. This year we had participation from our new partner schools in Michigan, I can’t believe we reached that far! We donated 2,500 books in one full week.

There’s so much going on, and we’ve been so blessed. We can definitely use some help to get books shipped out and get more books in, but I’m hopeful that will come.

While Court’s Kids plugs along there’s always the personal we’re working through. We’re approaching the second anniversary of my sister Courtney’s passing which comes in June. For me it is something I think about all the time, can it really be 2 years? I’m still getting used to the idea of not being a part of this duo I’ve always been in, “Kiki & Courtney”.  The last time I saw Courtney, I was giving her a kiss goodbye early in the morning before I left for work. She had just been passing through Portland on her way back to Klamath Falls with her three kiddos.

They were all sleeping soundly in our guest room when I crept in to say goodbye, I leaned over my sweetly snoring niece and touched Courtney on the shoulder. She turned around and leaned up for a half hug and kiss and we exchanged “I love yous”. I headed off to drop Colin at day care and went to work. Courtney and the kids left for the 5-6 hour trip to Klamath Falls a few hours later. She got everyone home safely and the next morning our entire universe shifted. She suffered a mini stroke in the night and never woke up. A few days later we let her go.

books for special needs

Kiki & Courtney

Those of you who know us know Bryan and I are the (sometimes not so) proud owners of Leroy, the chocolate lab, who is notorious for sleeping on couches and beds and things he’s not supposed to sleep on. Our usual approach to preventing him from ruining furniture when we leave the house is to close the doors to the bedrooms. Since the day Courtney left our house I have been physically incapable of shutting the door to the guest room. Unless there is a guest in there it stays open. Otherwise, there is a baby gate I put in the doorway to keep Leroy out. Dumb, I know…

Today I had a moment. In the process of laundry and cleaning I needed something from the guest room closet and left the baby gate just inside the doorway when I left. It’s still sitting in there. This may sound like a silly, non-important event, but it is big to me. The room is open now, completely. Almost 2 years it has taken me to leave the room open, unblocked. Maybe it means nothing, but maybe it means everything.

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” – Robert Frost

Little by little,


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